Donor eggs

Should I Pick an Egg Donor Who Looks Like Me?

November 21, 2022

Last updated:

October 31, 2024

Woman and child under blanket looking out a window.

If you’re looking for an egg donor, you may be wondering which attributes are most important. Is it her personality? Her interests? Her ethnicity? Her physical characteristics? As you browse the profiles of donors on our Family by Co platform, you will get to know each potential donor better. You will see what she looked like as a child, learn about her hobbies and life goals, and hopefully find someone who is the right match to help build your family.

So how important is it that the egg donor looks like one of the parents? We get this question a lot, so let’s dive into some considerations.

Inconspicuous families

If you want to increase the chances that the donor-conceived child looks like your family, then you may want to find a donor with similar physical features. Keep in mind – even genetic relatives can look wildly different. And picking a donor that looks like you in no way guarantees the child will look like you or the donor!

No matter how you bring your child into this world, people will ask questions like “where does she get her curly hair?” or “where did he get the tall gene?”. It happens to all families, and most people ask with curiosity, not malice. But – these questions can be triggering to some people.

What physical traits can I choose for an egg donor?

Our Family by Co platform allows you to search for pre-screened donors based on multiple criteria, including:

Race
Heritage
Ancestry
Hair color
Eye color
Height

In addition to these physical traits, you can also search based on:

Level of education
Personality
Left / Right brain

It’s free to create an account and browse the profiles of donors. Click here to get started.

Transracial egg donation

Can you pick an egg donor of a different race? Perhaps you are really drawn to a donor who is like you in so many ways… except her race. Should you still match with them? This route is absolutely possible but should be taken with thoughtful consideration. In the adoption world, conspicuous families are very common. But it does increase the chances of comments and questions from nosy people.

Selecting a donor of a different race or ethnicity also means that child may grow up with questions about their genetic roots that are different from yours. Talk about race from day one. Show the child the importance of diversity in society, and ensure that you socialize with people of different cultures. Surround yourself with other multiracial families and find ways to expose your child to their genetic culture.

Can you choose what your egg donor looks like?

You can absolutely choose what your egg donor looks like if that is important to you. If you want as many options as possible, check out our Family by Co platform. Plus, our unique model empowers women to take control of their own reproductive health while giving you the gift of a lifetime. Our donors aren’t doing it for cash – they keep half the eggs retrieved for their own future use, and donate half to your family.

How to find an egg donor that looks like you

Get started today and match quickly! Create a free account to learn about our pre-qualified donors — their values, personalities, and more. Once you’ve found the right match, we’ll make it official with your doctor’s approval.

Lauren Makler

Lauren Makler is the Co-Founder and CEO of Cofertility, a human-first fertility ecosystem rewriting the egg freezing and egg donation experience. Previously, as an early Uber employee, Lauren founded Uber Health, a product that enables healthcare organizations to leverage Uber’s massive driver network in improving healthcare outcomes through patient transportation and healthcare delivery. Under her leadership, the business helped millions of patients get to the care they needed. Prior to that, Lauren spent the early years at Uber launching the core business throughout the east coast and led the company’s first experiment in healthcare, national on demand flu shot campaigns. After a rare disease diagnosis, Lauren’s fertility journey led her to believe that everyone should have the opportunity to freeze their eggs–and that there should be better access to egg donors. She lives in Los Angeles with her husband and their miracle baby girl. She was named one of Fast Company's Most Creative People in Business in 2023 and recieved her BA from Northeastern University in Organizational Communication.

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